You Can Be a Guide for Other Survivors - Even if You’re Still Healing
“I want to be a High Conflict Divorce Coach for survivors of narcissistic abuse - but I still have my own trauma triggers. Am I qualified?”
“Healing” isn’t a finish line we cross. It’s a long, long journey. The good news? You’re already on it.
Survivors Don’t Need Completely “Healed” Coaches, They Need Real Coaches
Myth: To guide others through high conflict divorce and/or child custody battles, I must be fully healed.
Truth: The concept of “fully healed” is rooted in shame and perfectionism. We withhold opportunities, experiences, and necessary challenges from ourselves due to a belief that we are not worthy until we are “healed”. Should you be on your healing journey and prioritizing your healing, absolutely. Will anyone ever be completely healed from trauma, and who defines this level of healing?
Survivors need and deserve High Conflict Divorce Coaches who understand the reality of long-term healing. Who give themselves and others grace and compassion to live full, rich lives without the caveat of “full healing” first.
Do Survivors Make Good High Conflict Divorce Coaches?
Survivors make some of the very best high conflict divorce coaches out there for a multitude of reasons.
Survivors:
Understand the nuanced language and behavior of the narcissist.
Understand what it’s like to experience gaslighting and cruelty from the family court system (and other traditional systems).
Have often tried many different systems and tactics for coparenting with the narcissist - and can offer tips from their lived experience for what does not work.
Are often self-educated about abuse, trauma, healthy parenting, and the legal system, and thus have a plethora of recommendations to offer clients, including books, podcasts, speakers, songs, articles, and series.
Get it.
What if I Have No Job History of Formal Training?
Many survivors leave narcissistic abuse with the heavy weight of economic abuse on their shoulders. Whether the narcissist sabotaged their employment, established rigid gender roles, or systematically removed all self-confidence in their ability to gain employment, it can be extremely difficult to reenter the workforce after a relationship with a narcissist.
To qualify for the High Conflict Divorce Coach Training Program, you do not need any formal training or degrees, recent work history, or an established career in the coaching, mental health, or legal field.
Your lived experience as a survivor, desire to guide other survivors, and drive to learn and grow as a resource for others qualifies you for this work.
